Jen, it is hard, because we the suffer put spouses through so much crap, its just not funny, and you know from experience. It is hard for both parties, one fighting PTSD, one fighting emotional abuse the entire time. Both must heal at once and move together, otherwise either effort falls over.

When kerrie is better and back online, she would certainly be the best too ask, as it took a huge kick in the arse from herself to realize this, understand it, and both of us move in unison, not one, not the other, both at the same time in regard to the relationship aspect. Both can heal uniquely in many areas, but the actual relationship must be a joint effort.