Tig, you are correct, and it is another double edge sword event. For the spouse to support and help the sufferer, they must know what they are dealing with, and then for the sufferer to let it out to the spouse, they also risk the spouse with transferance... even though most don't know what it is, when you have that emotional connection, it occurs more frequently.

Terry must talk too you in small doses about how things make him feel in regard to his trauma, which means he doesn't have to tell you all the gory details as such, but a spouse can have the understanding required if they know how one another is feeling about a trauma, a rough outline as such generally paints a picture for a person.