I was raised Catholic... And well it is next to impossible to have the church recognize a divorce, but you toss in adultery even the Catholic church will recognize it. The bible has a few hard steady rules, but they also have made exceptions to those rules. So that is not a fair argument.

Also when you divorce, any lawyer sues for your fees to be covered and if what you describe is accurate they would do just that... Not sure where you are but that is just a standard proceeding in the states.

And no such thing as not go through the courts. You have to go to court to divorce.