Unfortunately Molly, the problem with PTSD is that its permanent. There is no cure for, only we can truly help ourselves. That is what I definately learnt on the PTSD course I did a couple months ago. Even though we had specialist come and talk with us during the entire course, they were merely a guide to help us fix ourselves. They could give us the tools, give us the knowledge, but if we didn't do something with it, then nothing would happen.

You are going to have bad days for the rest of your life, the difference is, how you handle those bad days, or even weeks. Before I knew what I do now, I could be depressed, anxious, angry, etc etc, for weeks at a time, no problem at all.

As to the trauma though, it doesn't matter really what trauma you suffered, it only matters now that there is help available to you. Everyone with PTSD, including myself, often think that everyone elses trauma is worse than their own. I guess it makes us feel better within ourselves or something. At the end of the day, we have all suffered trauma that has produced posttraumatic stress disorder, which make us all even on that scale, regardless how we got here. Don't put yourself down thinking that you trauma isn't as bad as everyone else, as the same result has occured because of it, which makes it significant enough to you, and thats all that matters.

You are trying to help your sister, which is a really good thing, but she obviously just isn't ready to accept the problems at hand. This generally becomes more frustrating, as you know she needs help to get away from drugs that suppress the emotions beneath, but she doesn't understand that herself. Many of us use alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, prescription medications, and so forth, but we know the problem exists, and know we need regular help, support and encouragement to get past the lower moments in our lives, so we continue. Your sister will come too in time, no doubt, but if she isn't ready, then nothing you or anyone else does will fix the problem for her, especially if she is actually suffering PTSD also. Denial is the hardest part to get past for anyone with PTSD. Everyone I met and know with PTSD have all said the same thing, "PTSD, whats that? I don't have that", or something very close too it.

I think the biggest thing that came to me during my course, was that we can only fix ourselves, not another, but we can provide support and reassurance to those around us who suffer the same. You sound that you are actively seeking answers, trying to find the right solutions to fit yourself, which is really good. Talking is the best way to help the healing process with PTSD... that I know for fact, hence why this place exists. We all help each other just by talking to one another, knowing where not alone. Maybe that is what your sister needs! Maybe its not!

I had PTSD for nearly 4 years before actually knowing I had PTSD. I had all the signs and symptoms, but didn't even know about it, let alone think I had it. When I was told I had it, I said, "no way", but eventually came around as counselling went on. You say that your not sure what counselling is for, but counselling is really for everyone, for anything what so ever. It there so you unload some of your problems, and by doing so, relieving yourself of some burden that you carry with you constantly. This is why this place is a great place to just come, start a thread, and unleash your fury within at the time. Camry stated in another thread here, "Usually when I need to unload, I have sent emails into cyber space (I write them then delete them)", which was her previous solution, which now she will sometimes unload here instead, so she has supporting people to answer her, and just know that someone is around to talk too who truly understands.

Your fears are very normal considering the circumstances. Your disassociation with your family, friends and general social interaction is normal. It is part of PTSD. The thing you need to be cognisant off, is that its not necessarily a good part of PTSD. It has taken me the last five years of basically pushing everyone away from me, to now know that that was not the best solution, though I didn't know better at the time, nor understand why I felt that way. I make a concerted effort now to talk with my family, in small doses still, associate with others occassionally, and slowly break myself back into society, so I'm not so reclusive. I still spend most of my time at home, as I just can't often deal with people around me well. This is all quite normal.

What I do now, is that when I have to go out, if my body says DON'T, then I don't. If my body says, NOT SURE, then I work out whether its really that bad to go to the supermarket, or friends house, and what are the benefits, ie. I will enjoy myself, I do need to go for a walk, etc etc... or I just do need to talk with another human. More often than not, it makes me feel better.