Hi Ashen,

Thanks for sharing your health problem (borderline Asperger's) I have a cousin that has it. I see why this would be a difficult area for you to "get".

Just a thought for you & your partner, why not have special codewords or sayings for each other.
If she is feeling unwell or uncomfortable when you are out then maybe she can come up with something like " I just need to ring "fred", do you mind coming with me". As her way of saying get me out of here!

If you have your own secret language then maybe she will "feel" a bit more safer with you.

Don't know if it will work, but it is worth a try.

Good luck & hope you are taking care of yourself.