Hi desert. You sound a lot like my situation. Read my intro. When I let W move back in first time he was exactly like that "It's not my fault", "help me to be better"....same..same ...I had three kids and a full time job. Now he has one bad aain I am at wits ed...don't need 4th 'adult' child to look after. I know I should be suportivae, and I am of his depression but he gets really nasty with it and lays all the bame for his issues on the children and I. I wish I didn't love the 'good' him so much...it would be so much easier. !! Hang in and keep posting..it's helping me. X