Hi Fred,

Welcome to the forum. Kerrie-Ann and myself are currently on holidays, though Kerrie-Ann currently doesn't have a computer with her, so she can't respond at present until the 12 Jan 06.

I appreciate that you have had traumatic events within your life, but did they give you PTSD? If not, then it is very hard in my honest opinion to know what a person with PTSD is thinking, feeling or suffering. Don't get me wrong here, this isn't a dig at you from your statement, it is merely how I perceive the effects of PTSD to those without it. I say this because some of those I have served with on operations didn't develop PTSD from the same / similar trauma's I was exposed. It is only a small handful of actual exposed trauma cases that develop PTSD from the event.

PTSD is completely different from just traumatic events alone, as it brings in depression, anxiety, withdrawal, social hinderance, anger, violence, and so so much more than just the original trauma itself.

Honestly, the best thing you have done is come here to ask other spouses about the facts, as books often don't highlight, nor give that emotional feel to the actual events of living with someone with PTSD. I know my wife struggles with me quite often... sometime PTSD, sometimes something may off just pissed me off.

I would say, find groups of spouses through RSL's, Vet support groups, VVCS and so forth, and actually chat with spouses face to face, so you get the full emotional and physical feel of the life experiences. Some with PTSD handle it better than others, some not so much. If a sufferer isn't in denial that something is wrong with them, then atleast that is a huge jump for the person, and probably some reassurance to the spouse that things aren't at the worst anymore.