:angry-fla :angry-fla , I'm crazy.Forrest Gump ,that is my skill level typing! For years I've kept a journal,my therapy! I write for a while the crazed anger dissapates. Woke up yesterday gaspin' for air (emphysema). For most of the time these last 2 yrs.I get up suppress my rage ,put on a happy face and suffer thru. I ran my daughter & grandkids off with my bitching. In the mean time every ****in' thing was an aggravation! From 9am til 10:30 I wrote! Of course that which got me to today 38 yrs. ago:angry-fla .The more I'm dealing with my va comp/pension app.Going back 2 mos I started research,then I submitted it to va reg. Salt lake,from the office in Moab,Utah,home.On it,PTSD was almost an after thought.Treated -none My explanation reads:"PYSD.Back in 69 we were men who dealt with it.Today I'M "O.K.".look back 40 years a classic case set in motion,knowing I was going to die in Vietnam anyway,social disconnect,failed relationships,alcohol abuse,which I dealt with everyday."I was on yahoo answer with a question about A.O.,PTSD and a possible link to my emphysema. That's when I heard from you.I signed in,sodamn spazzed I have been reluctant! I wrote wow I have an advocate,cool! I finally come back to try again, I see on top of my page diagnosed...! I was exstatic for a moment,til I read my submitted va 21-526. depression started Thur. afternoon,exploding into:angry-fla yesterday.I'm embarrassed and confused by this sight ,so I figured do it Sat when if it takes all day ,OK. 109 pgs http://www1.va.gov/agentorange/ orange readin' thru that for hours last nite was informative including the PTSD info. Frustration went backto beyond! How about Opium soaked pot laced with A.O. sold & delivered by momma-son,courtesy of DOD. Hell,it only has one line about drug abuse in the 109 pages! Like it wasn't an issue or problem. Of 8 who served in nam from moab,4000, 1 died there(lucky him) 4 are dead physical ailments.