"Self pity is the pabulum of growth toward healing in that it only sustains a state of bland maintenance rather than true personal growth."

"Self acceptance is the cacatyst for growth toward true self actualization."

From the time I was very small my mother would become angry and say these exact words,

"You stupid little idiot!" I forgive her. I really do. I must tell myself that because I know in my heartshe loved me the best way she knew how. She was horribly abused as a child and the victim of domectic violence as an adult. That does not excuse her behavior but it does help me understand why her parenting skills were so poor.

However, of all the abuse I received, her words have always rang clear in my ears. I am the creator of the above quotes. Not Piaget, not Addler, not anyone else! I'm not stupid! I'm not an idiot! I am a poet, writer, artist, mother, friend, and child of God. I am a person who doesn't want to pitty herself but wants to progress in personal growth and healing. I must remind myself when the pabulum comes to pass it aside for meat, potatos, green vegies, and fruit of healing and personal growth. I must do this by exercizing my mind with truth, reality, and hope instead of shame and self pity! The things I have been through have been reeking havoc on my live but I will write, get support, and grow toward healing and restoration.