I feel for you....that was a total screwy encounter with a doctor!!!! I can understand from what you said...about why you are so scared off of meds...I'm on some and have been on for years....Not all is addicting...But because of some people in the mental health field...have kept people on the addicting meds way longer that recommended!!! Therefore they get addicted to them...I started going to my Psychodoc several years ago...but it was a long time of dealing with the "idiots" out there!!! With my psychodoc...we have always discussed meds before I took them & he had no problem with getting the information so I could make an informed decision....We discuss every change that he recommends & I know that he knows his meds really well!!!!! I would suggest that you look for another doc...Keep Searching!!! You are worth getting the BESTI medical care that you can get!!!! My meds keep me at a level that I can function in life [unfortunately not at a job] I did have to go outside the Mental Health Center in my county....they weren't very happy about it...oh, well....It's taken me a long time to find just the right therapist [recommended by a nurse-casemanager at a hospital 1 hour east of here] and I also found my psychodoc there also...[my shrink at the MH center was a pompass ass!] I do drive 1&1/2 hours to see him but he's the BEST!!! He has no doubt that I know what's going on in my body....[the last doctor pointed at all his degrees on the wall and spouted off how many years it took him to get each one... ] The only thing he did that was helpful was that he diagnosed me with PTSD 3 yrs. ago....[I had been going to the center for 10 years and it took all that time for somebody to figure it out!!! Still life is difficult!!! KEEP LOOKING!!! It's not an easy task and can be down right uncomfortable [ ] I found out that every side effect listed was not nessasarily one that I would experience....The FDA requires that anyone who had any sort of side effect during the trials ... has to be listed even though only one person had it....Everybody's systems are different so it all has to be reported!!! I would recommend that you do some deep breathing before and right after you have a session with her!!! PEACE ...wildfirewildone: p.s. It's always up to you whether you use meds or not!!! Please be open-minded---you can also decide when you want to off the them [just jumping off on your own can make the side effects very very horrible!!!]