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Originally Posted by maus  Hay Evie,
I just started here a week ago or so. First I wish you well of course and I am happy to hear you're out of the hospital. |
Hey maus, nice to meet you and welcome to the forum. Did you call yourself "maus" after the graphic novel by Art Spiegelman? Or do you mean "maus" as in the word for "mouse" in one of the teutonic languages (German, Dutch, etc)? Sorry just curious, Maus is one of my favourite graphic novels. And I haven't had a chance to look at the introductions thread yet.
I understand about the damage to body thing. I don't really want to develop anymore ulcers or high blood pressure or something worse. I'm not planning on stuffing my anger if I can help it. Just the rages I've had have been absolutely extreme, and they've hurt the people around me. I figured out I can still be angry and express my anger without totally losing it. I hope I can continue to express my anger in more healthy ways.
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Originally Posted by maus When I got cancer I really got angry. |
Wow you are also a cancer survivor? Or you have cancer currently? There's definitely a grieving process with it, that's for sure. I've felt angry, sorry for myself, scared, upset... the whole gamut. I can still feel badly about it if I let myself, but I have an excellent prognosis so I'm trying to be as positive as I can. It's definitely a life changing illness, just like PTSD. And having both at the same time is wicked wild!!
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Originally Posted by batgirl Why? Is it a natural reflex to safe ones life? Is it survival instinct? Or has it to do with PTSD that we are too strong to give up as an option. I haven't come this far and survived everything not to have it end this way. Are we going on in the hope that one day the sun will shine again? Or is it that a psychiatrist says give it up you cannot do this and we want to prove them wrong not for them but for ourselves. Is it the challenge? Or is it the patronizing misplaced pity that pisses us of? |
OMG I just had the weirdest feeling of deja vu while typing this portion... as if I'd typed it to you before. Does that creep you out?!!? It does me... eek. Anyways sorry for that silly aside... for me I'm not sure why, I had been pretty depressed and obsessed with death (due to my trauma) until only about 3 weeks back, when my friend died. Then I realized I wanted to live and I haven't felt like dying or giving up since. I still think about death a lot in my mind, not my own personal death so much, but just cemeteries, bodies, zombies, people getting killed, etc, because it's part of my trauma.
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Originally Posted by maus Anyway. Get well soon and I hope you will find out that you can achieve a lot more beside control your anger. Maybe it is the first step for us to become in charge of our lives again. |
Thanks for that wish. I wish all that for you as well and again nice meeting you!