Welcome aboard.

You sound like a wise soul!
I understand what you mean about the PTSD as a third party to your marriage! We acquired our "mistress" the day before our 1st anniversary.

I agree that we must look after ourselves too, we aren't much good to anyone if we don't take the time to do things for ourselves. It's not being selfish, it's to help keep us up to the challenge of what this throws at us.