I have often said that I did far more damage to myself then my abuser's ever did. I rip myself to pieces over all of the stuff I didn't do but barely recognise all of the efforts I did make.

Hating myself came naturally to me. Blaming myself for everything followed right on it's heels. Loving myself was a completely forign concept. After years of struggling it came as a huge shock the first time I happened to see my reflection in a mirror and was not completely repulsed.