Hi desert4now,

I'm with Anthony, kicking boots is what you will need. I'm his wife so I know what rubbish it took to get him to move his ass in the right direction. My husband had denial down to an art form and as for him being right and me being wrong. It still is that way sometimes but I take less of his rubbish now that I ever used to. Honestly, all human beings like to be right, its just that you add PTSD and a military background and you have one self-righteous SOB. Sure he could have stayed in denial, sure he could have done it on his own but I was walking if the crap continued. He chose to take his sorry ass to a counsellor - I'm pleased that he did. Looking at his critiques from another perspective helps, that is he places you in the firing line because he feels so crap about himself. In reality, he probably doesn't feel that he now measures up and of the course the military give you higher expectations of yourself.

If you want to stay with him, stand your ground (although try and do it without emotion and anger - not like I used to), tell him what the boundaries are and let him know what the consequences breaching for those are. It's okay to support him but you are not his emotional punching bag and he is responsible for his behaviour - PTSD or not!