desert4now,

Its like this, doesn't matter what you do. When he is being critical it will always be your fault. I used to always be to blame for putting Anthony in a 'mood'. Never mind if he had hardly seen me all day. I just tell him to pull his head in now. Really, you can contribute to upsetting someone's day but you can't be responsible for how they feel or choose to behave. Its a choice to be angry and nasty, same as it is to be nice and loving. Sure, those with PTSD have a lower stress threshold but you can only compensate for that so much.

Description of an 'episode' varies from person to person I imagine. Usually anger, usually some sort of verbal dialogue, sometimes throwing things (hey I used to do that and I don't even have PTSD), often emotional disengagement and social withdrawal. Try not to fall into the pattern of walking on eggshells, it gets very hard emotionally. Straight up works best for us (Anthony and I) and I suggest with a military background it will also for your partner.