Hoo boy, I know that frustration! I don't have any answers. Just that maybe it's okay if the past affects our lives.

My past has affected my life in negative ways, for sure: I'm isolated, jumpy, scared, very, very emotional, depressive, careful, so overwhelmed...


And it's had weirdly positive effects, too: I'm really compassionate. I'm sensitive to people's moods, which gives me a heads up to people's anger but also their joy. I'm caring. I'm thoughtful. I'm aware of how rare love is in our lives.

I'm not saying it was worth it. I'm just saying....it is. Our past is a fact of our lives. It's scary to accept that.