Hope, your worse days, are someone elses sanctuaries. Yes, you are in a very low area of depression. What does this mean? You mind is on overtime in muck, your thinking on other everyday things is little to none, hun, hate to tell ya, you are normal for where you are now. Right now. I was there myself and will probably go through it again, but look at the past as far as what you won't have to go through again. There is a graduation throughout PTSD.
Medication helps alot through it though. I am on lexapro, anti-depressant, only one that has worked, (44, female, now,), no side effects, just keeps the lows up. Propranolol, non-addictive type sedative, my bestest friend in the world, and of course, xanax for when the boomers in my head activate.
Hunny, you are helping by your very words, and not even aware or trying.
There are so many online who have just started with their symptoms of ptsd and feel as though they are going crazy, as we all have, and find a kinship, that yes, someone else gets it.
In that you may have saved a life or two.
Keep writing, and being encouraged by others, there is no time limit for this broken brain syndrome, and we all care. Don't worry that you are in your position right now, we love ya fine, any position.
Yes we are broken, but this site is the best damn broken place I seen on earth. Just be yourself, and no negative self punishment to yourself, that's all I ask of you. You're going through enough as it is, don't kick yourself lower.
Then one day, you'll wake up, sometime in the near future, and come on a sudden want to investigate other threads that peak your interest, that will be a measuring tool, to let you know, depression is lifting, mind is more concentrated in other areas, and maybe,,,,,,,,,just maybe,,,,,,,,,something will even make you laugh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,like,
Why'd the black woman get all gussied up when the plane was going down, and everyone thought her crazy as they pushed and shoved looking for floatation devices?
They always look for the black box first. (hope ya smiled)