My physical stamina isn’t what it used to be. I’m not sure how much to blame on age, how much to blame on the fatigue from PTSD or if there’s no blame to place at all. I have two workouts a week (Thursday evening and Saturday morning) and it sometimes takes the rest of the week for me to feel not so damned tired anymore. I joke with my husband that my ‘snap back’ is broken. I take one day per weekend (usually Sunday) and do as little as possible other than rest and nap. I’ve never had to do this before. And then my Yankee/New England work-ethic gene kicks in for me not doing chores or something constructive while I’m home. Gotta love that deeply instilled guilt.

When my symptoms were really high, I could understand why I did this because my emotions just slap wore me out. But nothing’s changed on the physical side and a lot has changed on the emotional side (for the better). If something’s really bothering me emotionally I know why it knocks me down physically for a couple of days. When I’m feeling good (physically and emotionally) you’d think that my stamina would increase. No such luck.