thanks, guys... the advice is really helpful!! to answer anthony's question; she knows i have bi-polar disorder, but she doesn't know that i have ptsd. i don't want to come off as being not able to handle a relationship with her. i've been kind of hiding my ptsd in a way.
i've been feeling better as S and i spend more and more time apart... for example, i haven't seen her in 4 days, but have plans to make her dinner tonight. i am not as much of a wreck as i was before... i guess i'm getting used to being away from her.

Thanks, everyone...
God Bless,
Josh