Hey Kurfbird,

Welcome to the forum. Your wife has just started treatment so it is probably going to be hard journey for both of you. I understand where you are coming from regarding the absence of closeness and their continued efforts to push you away. Its hard on both sides of the fence. You have been married for a long time so that probably makes it harder for you guys. I suggest that you are grieving a little bit for what you once had and she is just to busy struggling with her own demons to really notice.

In the mind set that she is probably in at the moment it would seem to her easier to push you away. She doesn't have to deal with her own emotions, her PTSD and you. Like Anthony said, often the thing that will help them the most is a supportive partner but they often can't see that.

As for raising the kids......thats a tough one. I just recently returned to full-time work and I will admit to being concerned about how Anthony would cope with the little one. Generally, those two do alright but I know that I can't really afford to be home too late from work, as 'witching hour' after the days stress seems to be just too much. Don't get me wrong, my son is well cared for but he's a toddler and full-on. Sometimes he wears me thin and I don't have PTSD. How old are your children? Not that it really matters, at any age they are demanding in different ways. Do you have someone to share the care with, other than your wife? A regular break will do them and your wife the world of good. I ended up putting our little one in day care one day a week to give him some kids his own age to play with and to give Daddy a break.

Will it get better. Quite possibly it will as your wife is seeking help. One of the better things that you can do is to educate yourself, so that if she does feel like speaking about the trauma or PTSD you have a better understanding of where she is coming from. Also please keep posting here, there is a wealth of knowledge to be gained from all members of this forum. Take care.