So, after some serious thought, I've realized that constantly being behind in my academics puts me in a state of mind where I feel I am so far behind, which severely impairs my motivation.

I'd like to be able to drop the course I'm taking this summer, and just focus on me, finish my CICB application and take some time to relax, and not have my body and mind constantly holding stress. If at that point I still had time and energy that I felt I could put to good use, I would like to volunteer in the community.

But, I can't drop the class without getting kicked off of financial assistance for my academics. I'm so scared. I'm scared of not doing well, of losing what seems to be any chance for higher education and my future plans. I'm scared of my PTSD acting up while I'm in school, during the CICB trial, and getting kicked out for needing time off. I'm just plain terrified. I've had a headache for days, and I guess its physically apparent to me that my stress levels are too high.

Not trying to feel bad for myself, but I'm having some real problems seeing a way to fix this.

Sincerely,

A. Lauren