From the age of 13 - 17 I was on many different meds. All I remember is there was something to wake me up, something to put me to sleep and something to calm me down. During that period I became this drone that could not talk and had violent flashes of anger. When I was in the Mental Hospital I determined that the meds were what was making me so angry and causing me to black out so I decided to take myself off them. The doctors kept trying to make me take more but I've refused and have been med free since then, it has been 15 years now. I feel a lot better without meds and no longer go near them. The last doctor to give me med I took them to a new doctor and showed him. He took the pills and dropped them into a trash can and told me I did not need meds. What I needed was to focus on what happened in the past and all those meds would do is make me forget. Now when I see a new doctor I first ask them their position on medication. If they try to prescribe me anything I walk away and look for a new doctor. I now only take medication that is for my physical ailments and not for the mental. The only drug I remember the name of was Prozac and they kept uping the dosage on that one. When I found out what Prozac's side effects were I remember getting very angry at my past doctors and even had a few choice words with a couple of them. They still thought I needed to be medicated and did not realize just how much damage they had caused me. It really pisses me off to think that maybe I would not have ended up in the mental hospital if they had not loaded me up with so much crap... Guess that is in the past now and there is little I can do about it.

Well, jaa ne

Kat