Welcome to the forum, joseph. Lovely to have you.

Maintaining perspective in a situation such as yours is quite difficult. It requires work over a long period of time, there are no fast or easy solutions. Firstly, I must ask, why do you stay? You say she is abusive to you, and that you fantasize about divorce. So why have you not divorced her, or separated for a time? If you do decide to stay with her, be sure it is because you truly love her and want to spend the rest of your life with her, and not for any other reason(s). If she indeed has PTSD, it is a life long illness, there is no cure, and whilst she may become much improved and healed, it will never be totally diminished. Healing will take much time. She will need to work very hard upon herself, perhaps for years, and you will need to work hard at supporting her, working upon your own issues, establishing your own boundaries and so on.

If you are going to stay, you should firstly learn as much about PTSD as you possibly can, so you may better understand your wife's actions and behaviour. This forum is an excellent place to begin, read in the Information sections especially. Ask questions here as well, carers and sufferers alike will have good input for you.

How long has your wife been in therapy and on meds? Depending on the medication, it can be several weeks or even months to see a full effect. This is equally true of therapy. Not to mention, it is largely up to your wife to do the required work in therapy, and therapists vary greatly in their abilities as well. I do hope she is seeing someone who specializes in trauma. You may consider going into therapy yourself also, to work on your own issues. Self-awareness is vitally important for both of you.

Do take care, and good luck to you.