Marlene that makes perfect sense to me and jives with my thought process on it myself.

It's hard to understand the dychotomy of the sudden changes of mind. For example it was just 2 weeks ago that she suggested we set a month to move in together in the next couple of months. Then shortly afterwards she withdrew hard and I am dealing with the result of that withdrawel now.

I didn't think she would take it this far. I held onto all the things she said as truth and not something she would go back on. It was truth, but only in that moment. it feels somewhat like a betrayal...but now that I understand more thanks to you kind folks...I feel a little more equipped to handle this for the long haul.

I am better able to rationalize the situation and have a clearer perspective of what might be happening in her mind. I feel like when she is ready to try again I will know how to act and what to say to help her through all of this and help her be happy again.

The waiting is the hardest part at this point. In fact if I can continue to learn and contribute to things here it will make things easier.

I'd like to think that I can help her, I don't think she will be receptive to suggestions of seeing a therapist so Iwill have to gently guide her in that direction if it seems like the best thing.

I catalogued the events in her life as I know them from what she has told me. I wrote them down in a journal today. it is not my story so I don't feel right posting it, but I'm going to think about it for a time. Some of the things seem to make more sense now that I have written it down and been able to analize it somewhat.

It's amazing when the light is shone upon the situation. I feel like it all makes so much more sense now. I just wish I could share it with her.