All great advice. I did not end up doing anything rash this weekend even though the temptation was very very strong.

The most I did was text her a complimenting affirmation. I used to do those things all the time, but with her wanting space I have only done it twice. I sometimes get struck by the sense that she needs to hear something positive about herself and I can't fight the urge to send her something. Twice in two weeks is a hug amount of restraint for me. :)

Ok, so here's a little thing that's been running through my head that I'd like some feedback on (and I apologiize for asking lots of questions, but not having many answers for others).

So the week before we went on break she mentioned to me that she was writing about me. She said she watched the movie '50 First Dates' and realized how incredibly romantic it was. She said she had seen it before, but it struck her this time how romantic it was. The other thing she reall ysaid about it was she had been thinking about what it means to have to get someone to fall in love with you everyday. We talked briefly about it, and I didn't ask how it pertained to me specifically.

I got to thinking this weekend, how much does she relate to that movie? In the movie Lucy has short term memory loss and Henry ends up having to get her to fall in love with him everyday because he is in love with her.

If she relates to Lucy in that she has a disability that impedes her ability to love fully, such that I would have to essentially do all those things that make her love me all of the time. What are those things that I do that she likes that gets her to fall back in love with me? These are the questions she was asking herself and I am asking myself now.

Since it feeds my instincts I am wondering if this was a subtle hint that the "grand romantic gesture" I mentioned before would have a great affect on her. She has said before how she waffles on things, gets scared, and then I do something wonderfully romantic and she remembers how great she has it. Maybe she was in need of one? Maybe she knew she was faltering greatly at that point and subconsciously was hoping I would do something to snap her out of it.

Is it too late for that now? Is she too far gone in her head? Is her frame of mind shifted too much for that to be viable? I dunno. It would be a big risk to do it since if I was rejected it would make it hard to go back to normal.

I dunno...