This day has just been the balls. :biggrin: I mean really something great. I didn't even do anything special. Mostly just did what I usually choose and/or must do. But, there was what felt like an exaggerated difference in the degrees of happiness and hope I felt today and from so many other days.

I felt like I'd just found my way out of some deep, dark, painfully lonely woods, and was now delighted with this and with myself. I even thought, Wow, is this how other people without PTSD feel. I mean I was full of happiness, hope and joys, and in just in being me and in relationship to others. Wow!, was I ever able to get outside of myself today, in such a way that makes every last bit of this exhausting work worthwhile.

I was singing aloud to songs. I was laughing with my husb. and able to listen to him speak to me and in his way, and without feeling threatened. I didn't feel threatened, bc I now feel like I'm feeding, nurturing and pulling upon my spirituality that had just been so very lost to me and in my relationships and since the last time I proactively treated my progressively untreated PTSD. -(and was able and supported in doing so).

Again I just feel and deeply appreciate the self-esteem, internal strength & positive dialogue, and real feelings of happiness that I felt all throughout this day. Well perhaps only 96% of this day.

Something funny...............At least I think so, though I must admit when it was occurring, I did start to feel somewhat frustrated and a bit angry, but yet I did too completely understand. What it was is this: I had a therapy appt. early evening today and my therapist fought and struggled with herself to keep her eyes open. She was getting all foggy eyed, (LOL) and her eyes were just shutting on her beyond all her efforts.

OMG, I am cracking myself up now remembering this from earlier. I understood and just had to cut her slack and have compassion for her.

OMG,...............it was funny !

Hope

ps. I guess many of the smily emoticons are temp. disabled

Take Care,