You feel life has hurt you in many ways, hence you feel as though your struggling every step of the way at present. You are not that trusting within intimacy likely due to your feeling of being deceived and depreciated by someone. You are very aware of this problem. Your support systems are strong, yet you feel they dampen you in some way. Maybe this is your belief in fooling yourself, in that maybe they have not been as strong as you would like them to off been due to someone possibly failed to protect you who should have done so! Its like you are confused, yet desire to return to an earlier time, like childhood. An unhealthy relationship tarnishes your commitment, likely due to you demonstrate commitment towards someone or something other than your partner (if you have one); if single you you have commitment towards someone or something that may not yet recognise such. Your largest problem at present is feeling a victim of life, likely from a male, which you keep secrets still. You are pessimistic regarding your future at present. Confusion still predominates.