It is possible that for right now and on any given day, I might be ill. I might be even worn-out, exhausted, be and feel physc. wrecked and think intensely negative and all while I excavate, re-examine and clear away my experiences of trauma. So what?

This all passes. The good, the bad and the indifferent, it all passes and is replaced with the good, the bad and/or the indifferent. And, so life is ever changing. Good!

I've also found that on any given day, I think clearly, and do respond intelligently. I come further out of my shell and share and associate with others. I have chooses, can use wise discernment and overall accomplish a great deal of good and feel real damn good.

I'll take this flexibility any day over any of my previous rigidity where nothing ever, ever, ...and, I mean ever changed or passed.

This has me very, very pleased tonight, the simple reality that yes, life can change and does, feelings can pass and do, thinking styles can increasingly become more productive and will, life-syles can and do change, and more great surprises and pain are ahead. Hey, not too, too shabby, at all.

Got to say, it beats the crap out of both my complacency and aggression. Whether my aggression is directed toward myself or perhaps outward toward others, it simply has always turned up unproductive. My complacency never did any better of a job.

So this is it, decision, life, time and no rock left unturned.

Now there hasn't been much go easy for me today, but my life is not dependent upon easy. When I chose and/or went the easy route, my life was un'freakin'believably miserable, and far more miserable and seemingly permanent than anything I've yet to experience these days.

Hope