You say a lot of things in your reply Evie that make a lot of sense! Maybe because you took risks and got through alive has made you realise that you have a second chance!
I dont believe in fate and all that!
I think you are an amazing girl and as you said it will be your choice how you want to live your life! I know a guy my hubby who would not have survived what you have had thrown at you he is quite happy to look for sympathy when he is unwell!
Good Girl!!
Jen