Thank you for all your replies. Once again sorry that ya'll are going through this too; relieved immensely again not too know that I'm not alone.

I think that several times I've actually put myself in some pretty horrible shameful places because of this. And a couple of posts stated that they had to get angry or mad before they could say no.
I too often do this as well and it keeps me from doing what I don't want to do but it has destroyed a lot of good friendships personal and work wise. So are we saying that anger is not a solution to NO...

Has anyone read or are they in posts about automatic responses (for lack of better terminology) and how to change them.