Veiled are you trying so hard to figure out the trigger that you are getting yourself all worked up???? I know that the dates for you are tough, you know they are coming so is it possible that you are on guard to the point that your body reacts??? Or when it finally hits that the date is here that you go into overdrive to try and protect yourself from what you think might be coming???? Just asking I guess to get a better feel for what you are going through.

I wonder if hypnotism might be an avenue for you to explore... It can be helpful with some traumas. Might be worth looking into. Hell if you can't figure it out, get rid of it.......

Hope you're doing a little better.