I was on Depakote, Paxil and Risperidal. I went from 165 pounds to 235 pounds. No longer jogging 1 mile, but was, before I quit the poisons, walking maybe 100 meters in severe pain. And the doctors told me "nah, you just gotta eat less and work out more often." And they blamed my frequent painful urination on being diabetic.
Eat less and work out more often, eh? I dare them bastards to explain this-
1. after I quit those poisons, I went from 235 to 205 in 5 weeks. Before I did time in jail this last summer I was at 182. Right now I am fighting like crazy to stay under the 200 mark.
2. As soon as those poisons wore off, I went from walking 100 meters in pain to walking one mile painlessly. Within 2 months I was walking just shy of 4 miles round trip in 1 1/2 hours with no pain. Exhausted, out of breath, but I felt great.
3. A couple years later I went to a doctor, he viewed the reports the other doctors did, and he was bewildered- "why was you on these medications? Even the reports don't mention any of the symptoms you need to qualify for those?" A couple years later I met a sales rep for the company that does two of those (Ely Lily, IIRC) and in discussing this he was concerned as well. Why did they have me on those when that particular mixture had gotten the drug manufactures sued because it causes permanant liver damage. And he said the primary symptoms of the liver damage is frequent and painful urination along with extreme dehydration while the body will retain water, all causing sever pain in the joints.

Now doctors and my probation officer are telling me there is a strong chance I need medication. My probation officer has no medical experience. And he's telling me I need meds. I have scared all the doctors though. Each time they start talking medications, I tell them "sure, I'll take whatever drugs you want. But if it turns out you're wrong, I'm gonna beat the living pulp out of your ass. Any permanant damage, and (deleted)...."

Coincidentally, I did see a psychiatrist a couple years back, and we discussed this in depth. He sees no benefit the meds will have. His recommendation? CBT. And this is a guy that makes money off of prescribing meds. And he's the only one I havn't threatened.


My probation officer has told me it doesn't matter if the meds are good or bad for me, if he wants me to take them, I will. Because if I don't he will revoke my probation and I get four years in prison.


God I can't wait until I win my appeal....