First off, you need to leave your husband because he's the main source of your PTSD. Having you all stressed out and everything. Then you need to get some counselling by someone you trust. Before you go thinking I'm being mean, I'm not because I'm having a PTSD moment right now myself, not only from the abusive relationship I had but after him I had a man use the hell out of me and sleep with other girls WHEN HE KNEW ABOUT THE ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP ahead of time. Believe me, I know its hard as hell but you have to do what's right for you and your health.