I don't know if this is the type of diary I am use to keeping--the daily type? So if it is not will someone let me know because for now I am going to treat it a one.

Back to the doctor with Mom again today. The stress this has me under is so obivious I don 't know how she does not notice. We get home, I eat lunch and then go for my nap. My naps are usually 5-6 hours after going out into the word. Just is so hard on me. I just never get use to it.

I've had headaches, some pretty intense ones again! It has been a long time since these headaches have invaded my life. I know it is the stress of having no choice in whether I go out or not. Gotta go-period-!!! This is so dam hard, but I got no choice. I am slipping into my chasam of retreat, or what I call my "hiddy hole"!

I know my sleeping is my escape mechanism but I have this guilt that I am ignoring my mom when I say I', going to sleep. I feel like I am not careing for her properly!!! Well, I'll just pile on some more guilt on myself, that always helps! Will someone please tell me how to shut my brain off. Make the noise and guilt STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!