Hi Neela, Thanks for posting. I have browsed through your thread just now, and i appreciate you sharing your opinion in my thread too. It is hard, but i am respecting what he wants now. We both agreed to give each other time and space to heal, and to figure ourselves out, and get ourselves together on our own time. I guess what kinda got me was that we had 12 days of no contact, and i was starting to feel a little bit better about myself. Of course i did think about him and i was always concerned about him and how he's doing..but i never over stepped his boundaries. I never IM'ed him and i never e-mailed him either. I gave him the space he asked for, and i respect that he needs that space too.

But on my side, i wasn't ready to talk to him, but even though i wasn't ready...i still IMed him back, because i pushed my feelings and needs aside to be there for him. It's so conflicting the emotions i feel...but i am here for him, and i'm trying not to think about how i feel. It just caught me by surprise that he IMed me out of nowhere when he told me he needed alone time too. I understand that he can't think straight, or he's confused, and so on...but i guess on my side it just seemed confusing....i don't know..it's hard to explain how i feel.

Maybe you can understand? I'm not too sure...since you and your bf are still together...but mine broke up with me and pushed me away..yet torments me by contacting me once in a blue moon. So while i'm trying to heal...and i feel like i'm at a point that i'm starting to do better, he appears. I could block him on IM, but i don't want to do that either...because i want him to have the opportunity to reach me when he wants to talk to me....it's just conflicting, you know what i mean?? Even if i blocked him on IM, he could call me from Iraq, and the numbers are always different, sometimes local numbers, and sometimes unknown numbers...if i answer and it's him...am i supposed to hang up on him?? Goodness..i could never do that...so i put up, and i deal with it, and talk to him....and again, i push my feelings aside.

I hope your situation is okay, and that you are your bf are coping well. You're lucky that he opened up to you and told you he has ptsd, and has been diagnosed. Yes, Iraq is a stressful and dangerous place to be...but if he is on Myspace, and other forums, and on IM chatting to other friends and family members...yet i'm being shut out.....??? It stings like hell.