I had my appt with the therapist yesterday. Explained to him that I am really tired of constantly apologizing for my existence and never receiving any apologies from anyone else in my life-even him (when he had said something that really upset me a few weeks ago).

One of his may "comments" was that an apology may be given in order so that the act requiring the apology, can be done again. Wouldn't it be better if instead of just apologizing, that we make the conscious effort to not do the same offending action in the future.

I felt so guilty. In the past few weeks, I have kind of told him off (a little each week)-gone in the next week with my apologies-and then wound up telling him off again-just to apologize the next week. It is a terrible circle. So, does that mean that my apologies are worthless? meaningless? Just a thing that I do, so I am entitled to do the same offending act again?! What kind of person does that make me???

nor

Oh-and he still didn't apologize