Kathy,
I don't want to intrude, and I know losing a parent is very different than losing a child however I do know that grief is grief, and I wanted to tell that what has helped my family through this first year without my dad was celebrating the holidays and special days accepting that we miss him badly and remembering how much we loved him knowing he would want to be there celebrating with us if he could. I don't know if that helps but the only thing I do know is that we will always miss those who go before us, but every day it gets a little easier and sometimes you don't feel like its easier but it does. Do what you need to do, but keep moving forward if you can, and some days thats a whole lot easier than others, do take care of yourself.