Holly,

So sorry you are having so much anxiety.

I too disassociate and it is from sexual abuse at a young age. That is how we protected ourselves. This is why we don't remember the actual abuse, we just know it happened.

I don't have a gd, but one of my triggers is hearing about small children being sexually traumatized. The confusion and pain hit me from no where and I go into depression and I robot through a few days.

Love your gd as hard as you can and concentrate on the positive love between gm and gd.

Hugs,

vst