the shame I have felt these past few weeks have triggered alot of guilt. I read some of the stuff others have done so I quess here goes. After my father died and my mom abandoned me. I was trying really hard to find someone to love me, I would meet a boy or man (some of them were twice my age) and I would get them in bed thinking in the morning they would be there and love me.(I probably told them I loved them after that first time) I did this from 14 till about 20 till I got lucking with my hubby. Weve been married 28 years...But took me at least 100 boys/men to find my knight.