Funny you mentioned Catch-22. I've had PTSD since 1979, from a false alarm in nuclear forces. I had my first night-terror the first time I fell asleep afterward. I had flashbacks and the same night-terror for almost a decade before the diagnosis hit the mainstream. I first learned the word "flashback" as a cinematic term. Watching the movie Catch-22, I was broadsided by the flashback scenes. I kept saying to myself, "I know this." That's the best depiction you could probably find of a long-term flashback sequence, IMO.
It took me 13 years to have the entire flashback, then it stopped. The night terrors stopped, but so did the good dreams. I've only been debilitated by PTSD three times in 28 years. As profoundly as my world is shaped by that event, I still did well at school and at work almost all of the time. During Gulf I, Gulf II, and now with the president prattling on about "WW III" I suffered episodes that knocked me flat. Even without the flashbacks and night terrors, I suffer. The worst part, I think, is not knowing what's going on when it starts. I blame everything else, but. I hate myself so much it doesn't make sense---there isn't that much of me to hate. And it is very difficult to function. After getting an invitation to an Honor Society, I failed two classes and now have my first academic warning. It always feels like I lost myself and I have to constantly remind myself that this is an episode and not my whole life.
Since you're using a vet, you may want to include wars and the war drums as triggers. Even WW II vets show up at the ward when a new war starts and the media is all jingo and gun-ho. |