My ex-boyfriend abused me verbally and emotionally. The straw which broke the 'camel's back' was when he punched me in the face, after just coming out of hospital from lower back surgery, splitting above my eye open.

My blame: When he was less abusive, but still abusive, I did nothing to change the situation. I complained yes, but he didn't stop and I made a bad choice thinking 'things would change'. When he hit me and I saw all the blood I knew I was faced with a life-alerting choice - I either got out and saved myself or I had to live with the consequences having all the knowledge of past behaviour to assess the situation with. To stay would have made me a 'victim' of my own bad choices. I left and have never looked back. The choice I made from then, which I had control of, was that I would NEVER allow another man who I was in a relationship with abuse me. Can I control that, hell yes, there are the signs and I now pay attention rather than choosing to ignore them hoping they all go away. No-one like that generally ever improves or changes for the long term unless something life changing happens to them or they want to change for themselves.

I do have control and I now choose to own my responsibility for the relationships in my life. I will no longer contribute to an abusive relationship by choosing not to be in one!