Well guess i know my answer now.

Fate has a funny way of working - if it exists. He asked me what i am doing on the web all the time so i told him and said he could ahve a look if he wanted. He said "No not really i would just think *****************************" ( sensored this because it will hurt you like its hurting me so badly right now). Grrrr i know i said i didnt want to force him and i dont but im actually feeling sooooooooooooooooo angry about it right now. Is that really what he thinks about me? he just asked me to look at aprogramme he wanted to show me after that and i just bit his head off. How can he expect me to do that when he has just rejected my feeling and the way i am at straight off? I love him so much but he really doesnt understand. I'm sure he just wants me off the computer but i need to be here and he cant see that. I feel so low now - just want to break up into pieces and dissappear. Im so sorry if this angers you too. Just had to get it out. Sorry.