Answers. Boy, aren't we all seeking those! This whole PTSD thing is pretty new to me, althought I have been experiencing it's more interesting sides for the past 5 years. BUT....I have been a guy for a long, long (long!) time, and can give you an answer or two about that.

Sarah, guys fix things. That's what we do in place of talking. You come to us with a problem and our first impulse is to fix it. We don't want to talk about it, we just want to act. It isn't anything bad, not as far as we're concerned. It's what we are here for. In the beginning of time, you told us you were hungry, we went out and killed something. Today, you tell us you're cold, we get up and turn the heat up, or throw another log on the fire. That's just what we do. We don't talk. Not that we can't, it's just that we don't. I have an ex-wife that was convinced that there was a word bank that men and women have. Women have hundreds of thousands of words in their daily word bank, and men have about 250. We use up those 250, and then have to wait till the next day to refill it. So, don't feel bad when talking is not what we want to do. It's not in our genes.

Sorry that doesn't answer all of your questions, but maybe this will give you something to chew over, and you can find something in there that will help move you in the right direction.
Take care, Warren