I've gone through all this too. Knowing things just weren't right. Things that you look back on as an adult and you KNOW it was inappropriate behavior. I have been told by several different therapists over the years that they believe I was molested but I have no direct memory of it. I never discussed this with my family so when it was brought up by my step satan that he thought I was probably spreading rumors that he had molested me...I found that suspicious. Like you, Seeking Nirvana, I got the courage up to finally ask a relative if there was anything that the family ever suspected. She broke down crying! She said that my mother was even confronted by family members, that they begged her to do something, to leave my step satan. She told them they didn't know what they were talking about. In a way I felt validated... the man makes my skin crawl, and I feel ill around him, feel like I need a shower after I am around him. It helped me to get information. He has always tried to label me mentally ill, defective and a liar. A lot of my emotional problems are a direct result of his actions as he was abusive in MANY ways, but he has a degree in social work and tries to use that credential to make people think I am insane. Throws out some bigs words and mentions his degree. The older I have gotten though the more I see that OTHER people see through his BS too, and that helps. What I'm trying to say is that with my memories being fuzzy but having so many red flags pointing to being molested and my symptoms being stronger around him...it was all a bunch of confusion that I didn't need added to the rest of the crap going on inside me... I needed some validation to be able to finally accept it and rightfully claim my anger. I will never be over it but the validation of his evils makes it a little more bearable for me to suffer through, my anger is a comfort sometimes and feels clearer in my head than fuzzy confusion.