Great thread here. Thanks Bat Girl. It has made me think from many different perspectives, and reframe my thoughts.

2 years ago, I started dating a great guy; I would say the sweetest man I had ever met. After 6 months he was getting slightly apathetic in the relationship and admitted that it was probably connected to the traumatic event which had occurred years earlier. I had wrongly assumed my friend had come to terms with his trauma as much as could be expected. i had not educated myself about PTSD at that time, obviously.

He agreed to go to therapy to work on this for his own sake- but also to help the relationship. Neither of us expected the hell that was to result from this treatment. I guess he was in denial at that stage, and I was just stupid.

I assumed we were in it for the long haul, and did my best to support. But my friend's character changed so drastically that i don't know who he is right now. I don't think he does either. But, I still see beyond his symptoms and coping mechanisms and feel a sense of unconditional love for him- he is still that really wonderful human being even though he is ill.

At the same time, I know that I can't be close with him, because it causes us both too much pain. Because of this, I can't wait for him, but I will always support and care for him.