Gulp...I am employed full-time, but am presently on a short-term medical leave. I had a terrible bout of flu in January which seemed to open a door to severe depression and a resurgence of PTSD symptoms -- I haven't experienced this in seven years. One of my best friends, who has PTSD, is on permanent disability. She's encouraging me to take this route -- she knows me very well and we had a frank conversation last week about my terribly checkered work history (lots of absences due to illness/exhaustion; been fired four times; mediocre performance reviews; always too slow for the frenzied expectations at work...etc.). I am feeling like a useless waste of time because I'm beginning to wonder if I can work full-time...I'm 48 years old; have had one job or another since I was 17, and I am, for the first time, seeing my work history from the perspective of PTSD and its effects. To put it bluntly (and I hope it's OK to use the "f" word in this context), I feel like a total ****-up in the working world. My predominant feeling is of being overwhelmed and most of my energy goes into keeping my head together and not looking like the mess I am inside. I come home feeling utterly ragged and exhausted every day; I work in an environment that is very negative -- autocratic leadership; constant pressure to perform, etc. I would love to hear from anyone who struggles like this with full-time employment. Thanks...Roo.