While leaving someone while they are ill is difficult, so is exposing your children to situations which leave an imprint on their slates of life... a Dr Phil comment I know. Your children have already lost their mother and are obviously suffering from it. To then add to that someone who is self-focused while putting stress and strain on everyone, ill or not, is not good. Your children need a safe haven somewhere...they need to come home and feel safe. I grew up walking around on tippy-toes due to an abusive situation (which yours sounds like) and I still pay the price for that as an adult. Can your wife go for a holiday/break somewhere and visit relatives/friends?

Alcohol is self medication...a deadly mix - 5 prescriptions and then one self inflicted medication of sorts....bad news if you ask me. It does also sound like your wife is not willing to take any responsibility for her actions; instead choosing excuses.

Please take care David and I wish you the strength to make the right decisions.