Spirit X~
Your words are very comforting and are exactly what I needed to hear. I truly feel like he is testing me. I know that in his past everyone has always walked away from him when he was like this. He was married twice before. Both times he was on active duty for the marriages. I think that would be hard in itself to be away at war, then home again with a family, then off to war again. What an emotional rollercoaster. Anyway, I am trying to show him that I am there for him without being to intrusive. Some type of contact once a week or so. (either email, card, or voicemail) I am a very spiritual person which helps me a lot because I know that no matter what I am feeling, I am never alone.

My BF has never had a girlfriend (or wife for that matter) that has stuck by him in the hard times. I am of the belief that the grass is not always greener on the other side. I think that we all have our imperfections, some people can just hide theirs better than others. PTSD is not easily hidden at times.
When I asked him if he wants this to work (our relationship), he would nod his head yes. But then his words and actions would not show that he wanted it to work. He says that he would just ruin my life if I allowed our relatoinship to continue. I told him that it was not just his decision. And he said, although that was true he had to live with the decision too and just could not allow me to ruin my life with someone so messed up.

I am not naive. I do not think the road with him and PTSD would be easy. But I do think it could be very rewarding and fulfilling. It could be wonderful. And who knows....maybe someday there will be a cure for PTSD. We can all pray for that day.

I am supposed to see my BF tomorrow night. He is slightly protesting, but he is the one that originally offered Tuesday night to talk. Not sure if we actually will hook up, but I am hopeful. I miss him.

Any advice on our meeting tomorrow night would be helpful.

Thanks!