I agree, when I am hurting I push everyone away. It is a solo act to reconstruct our thoughts. Since no one understands this disorder they can't figure out what I may need to weather the storm. The only one who would get it is my Therapist but I always have an attitude to call him for help. Just last week end I had a really bad time and became suicidal again. Did I call - NO. Stupid. I think its because I don't want to be needy or seem weak.

It is at those times I think I need to retrain myself and buck up to take care of me. Next time I will call him whether I want to or not; if I remember at the time.