I see things a little differently. When I decided to go to therapy, I knew what that would entail, and I assume that all of us know what therapy entails, it means we will have to divulge our traumatic events in order to heal ourselves. To go into therapy, something that I seek out for myself, and not tell all on purpose, is counter-productive in my eyes. I would have to seriously ask myself why I was in therapy in the first place - is it to pacify my fragile and irrational state of mind or is it to learn how to face my traumas, deal with them and cope with the resulting symptoms? I'm surely not paying someone with a PHD hundreds of all dollars a session to pacify me, I'm paying him to do his job. He is not my friend. He is not a member of my family. He is my Therapist, a professional. I do not expect him to do anything more than his job, and if I don't like the style in which he works, then I will find a new one. I would not take his particular "style" personally and if I do (and I HAVE), again I find a new one.

I don't go into the supermarket and expect that they do their job differently simply because I don't like the way in which they choose to sell their food, I simply find a new grocery store, but I would never starve myself.

To stay with a therapist that one doesn't trust or doesn't fit one's "style", is harmful and a waste of time. If you generally like your therapist but at times, your therapist pushes you in ways that feel uncomfortable and not to your liking, I take that more as a reflection of the patient and not the therapist. A person is either willing to heal or not.

I hope this doesn't sound as if I don't believe in a patient having a say regarding their health, because I do believe in that concept. However, like Herc, I have noticed a lot of posts about not wanting to "go there" in therapy and I've wondered to myself why that person is in therapy in the first place.

I'm not a therapist, that's why I hire one.

Best,
Rachel